Prom szn is in full swing, and while planning and prep for the biggest, most fun night of your high school career can be stressful, what's most important is that you head into the festivities with unshakeable confidence in how you look and feel. YouTube creator Larri Merritt, better known as Larray, doesn't hold back from showing off his infectious personality to this 8.74 million subscribers — but as a high school junior and senior, his confidence got in the way of him being able to fully enjoy his prom experience as his authentic self. And he skipped his senior prom for this very reason.

Here, in his own words, Larray shares with Seventeen what his prom experience was like, his prom dreams had he approached things differently, and a message to those going to prom this year to ensure you have the most authentic time of your life.

Junior Prom Nightmare

For me, my junior prom was a bit of a nightmare. I went to my prom before I came out. I didn't really want to go, but my dad really wanted me to. He had a strong vision for what he wanted me to be, and he went all out. Like ~all~ out. He got me the perfect tuxedo and a limousine to share with not one, but two of my girlfriends as prom dates.

But on the day of the prom, I felt so uncomfortable. I just didn’t feel like me.

We went to the prom, and I remember being so worried about what people would think of me. I tried to have fun, but I just couldn't. At the time, I was so uncomfortable in my own skin that I couldn't wait for the night to be over.

I've never forgotten that night. It was a night that I wish I could redo since prom should be such an iconic night…and I still might!

In My Prom Dreams

If I could go back in time and redo my prom it would be a night full of love, acceptance, and fun.

When it comes to fashion, I think it's dope when men break barriers and wear dresses and makeup. I'd love to have gone with a little makeup and eyeliner. Maybe I’d wear a pink suit, crop top suit or dress. My hair would be styled like my current hair since it is how I feel most comfortable. Y’all wouldn’t believe it, but my whole forehead was out when I was in high school… and we can’t have that! And when it comes to accessories, I wouldn't want a traditional boutonniere, but I'd want a sunflower! It would look so clean to wear all white with sunflowers!

I’d love to get all my friends together at my house so we can take pictures, dance to music from my favorites like Taylor Swift, Beyoncé, Ariana Grande, and Blackpink, and we’d ride out together on a giant party bus!

One aspect of prom that I never got to experience was the perfect promposal. It’s something that many LGBTQ+ youth don’t get to experience.

One Perfect Promposal

Would look something like this: I’m in school, maybe fourth period heading into lunch, and there’s this line of people looking at me. I’m like OMG what’s going on? And then as I start walking through the line of people, they start cheering, the cheerleaders are dancing and flipping in the air, and then I see him… Shawn Mendes, waiting for me with a big sign!

Ok so maybe Shawn Mendes didn’t go to high school with me, but I still think it would be such a beautiful feeling to be asked to go to prom and have all my family and friends support me.

My Prom Message

To anyone out there, especially my LGBTQ+ youth, who are afraid to go to prom, I want you to know that you are not alone. I was once in your shoes, and I know how scary it can be. But I also want you to know that you are beautiful, you are loved, and you deserve to have a prom that is inclusive, accepting, safe, and so much fun. You deserve a prom that feels every bit like it looks in the movies. So, keep your head up, your liner sharp, and keep doing you. You deserve to have a night that you will never forget!